Lentils

“No reason to lie when you can shock them with the truth. It’s more interesting anyway,” you said.

Lentils, cooked or not, are still lentils. They just smell different. I squeezed them tightly in palm of my hand.

“Anthony, why’d you give me cooked lentils? That’s so weird. Why are you so weird?” He always loved lentils. The red kind, not the green.

“Anthony. Darling. Let’s walk up this hill and catch the last sunset together. It’ll be worth it. I’ll buy you a home by the sea, just like you wanted.”

You asked me why.

“Because that’s what people do when they love each other, Anthony. That’s what we do.”

For the unforgettable – Ecuadorian flute bearing – MJ.

-mh-

Any Excuse

I’ll take any excuse to love you

So explain to me that the sky isn’t blue

That this pain I’m feeling isn’t real

Tell me that people don’t really have two hands Tell me we’ll live forever

even though I know someday we all have to go

I’ll take any excuse to love you

Any excuse to believe that this might somehow work Tell me that when you paused

when I asked if you thought we’d be together always

That you really meant yes

Rivers

You tiptoed away into the forest

the leaves fell sylvan green

branches crossed light filtered through

the specks of light turned shadows

 

You looked back at me a moment

I thought I felt your hand against mine

 

it was just the warmth of the sun trickling through the trees.

 

And when the fog lifted

rubble, boots, rivers

the things you whispered still floating in the air

 

I realized that it was just me.

Tunnels

i’ve lived 4 lives in 2 years.

streaks of light tunnels racing

scenery like a film reel flashing

skipping scenes

you told me you didn’t love me

i drank whiskey, dark, forgotten words

 

and then there was laughter

skipping down an empty sidewalk,

and a midnight moon

can we stay here forever?

i don’t want to forget

 

does forever exist?

no

 

vibrating

shaking

swelling

 

it’s getting so loud

and we’re moving so fast

(too fast?)

all of a sudden the deafening roar

The lights snap, bursting white sparks into black

Silenced

Dark, vast… where?

 

The end of the tracks

cut the noise like a sliver

This is where 4 lives end

And one begins

 

I can still hear their voices.

-mh

galaxies

And when we’re up there on the summit,

where the sun meets water’s edge

we’ll see why the tides fell like they did

and why the moon always shone in that very same spot.

why no matter how the wind blew

you’ve always felt like my soft spot to land.

 

you’re my home amidst the clamor and the lights

and maybe you’re my north star

 

– or maybe this is what happens when galaxies collide.

There goes my love. 

there goes my love
There goes my love
I’m letting it die

I’m letting it fade from inside and slip out from beneath me

And I don’t want to go

But this is where I’m going

I don’t want to go

But I’m letting you fade away

I’m letting your kisses slip from the trace of my lips

I’m letting your touch slip from the curves of my back

And right now it breaks my heart

It breaks my heart that one day it won’t.

The Girl I Remember

Sometimes I forget who she is.
The girl who loved “Moon River,” the girl who dreamed without daring
Sometimes I forget who she is.
The piano player, the flower picker, the one who always buys way too many cinnamon brooms
come Autumn.
The smiler, the feeler, the midnight dancer
The one who knows that sometimes the best remedy to a rough day is a candle, some Norah Jones, and
someone warm to lay next to
The rainy day dreamer, the walk taker, the nail painting optimist
The night-time romantic
The lover, tea drinker
The “sometimes I need you”

— I have been trying for so long to be so strong. But more than anything, the girl I really am just wants to wake up to the warmth of your arms around her, say “good morning” and smile, knowing I’ll be next to you every morning from now on.

Sunrise

sunrise in san francisco

6am and the world is still

light barely sifting past windowsills and eyelashes

the glow of your voice and the silence of the morning as

the sparkle in your warm light

illuminates the gray

gently waking sleeping birds and sleeping souls

 

we’ll dance across the city

skipping stones of notes and verse

the city comes alive

 

there’s coffee on your doorstep

there’s music in the avenues

there’s grime, there’s history, there’s heartbreak and it wraps around the alleyways

 

but the cracks in my heart are fading

as the leaves begin to fall

 

and for a moment

everything else is still

everything else is quiet

everything fades into white and

 

it’s just me

it’s just you

and the sunrise.