Photograph

You told me life was impermanent, that like dandelions, we all fade

And I’m too ashamed to say that I don’t want to be alone

I’m too scared to admit

That I find meaning in every little thing you say

And I don’t want to hear what you said circling in my mind

In that empty room in the dark as the lights go out across the city

I’m too scared to tell you that

I wanted to paint you in a memory that I can’t even place

on fingertip, on in-between, on this nonstop reel of

flashing scenes, of poetry, of faded light

She said “I paint flowers so they will not die,”

And I wanted to take this record and make it spin forever.

If I could bottle up your brilliant heart and give it to the

sun

watch it rise every morning

as I lift my head from the pillow

Maybe I’d remember

this is why we love.

Lentils

“No reason to lie when you can shock them with the truth. It’s more interesting anyway,” you said.

Lentils, cooked or not, are still lentils. They just smell different. I squeezed them tightly in palm of my hand.

“Anthony, why’d you give me cooked lentils? That’s so weird. Why are you so weird?” He always loved lentils. The red kind, not the green.

“Anthony. Darling. Let’s walk up this hill and catch the last sunset together. It’ll be worth it. I’ll buy you a home by the sea, just like you wanted.”

You asked me why.

“Because that’s what people do when they love each other, Anthony. That’s what we do.”

For the unforgettable – Ecuadorian flute bearing – MJ.

-mh-

Any Excuse

I’ll take any excuse to love you

So explain to me that the sky isn’t blue

That this pain I’m feeling isn’t real

Tell me that people don’t really have two hands Tell me we’ll live forever

even though I know someday we all have to go

I’ll take any excuse to love you

Any excuse to believe that this might somehow work Tell me that when you paused

when I asked if you thought we’d be together always

That you really meant yes

Flowers

Covered spaces, cracks in the pavement

The way our smiles lit up dusk like twilight

Love me forever

If only for this moment in time

Light up my life my heart like fireworks

Blanket my soul

We didn’t notice the dandelion seeds blowing in

endless roads, distance, causeways for miles and miles

We’ll take these trails hand in hand forever

didn’t notice the foxtails in the distance,

flowers got in the way

The movies

sun setting over highway 94

your voice still an echo fading,

distant sunlight

you know i’m driving all the way to chicago,

i don’t know if i’m ever coming back home.

i remember the way you used to look at me

you didn’t know i longed for you the same.

melt my heart into your pillow

don’t you know your smile shoots

darts like sunbeams?

i know the days we walked in darkness

were numbered, so numbered

if these streets could talk they’d tell you

that i still remember

sand dollars, that one day

and i wanted you so badly

i wanted so badly for you to be the one.

Salt

salt and snow gravel grind beneath your shadow smile

miles and miles,

left behind the train tracks skidding with the pebbles dancing off the rails as we race on by.

Don’t you know we’re going to Alaska?

you say laughing, throwing your hat into the air

throwing

your

hat

into

the

air

for a moment all i see is your joy

and in that moment i know that nothing else matters

-mh-